Courageous Constance

9:55am Friday 8th February 2008

BEING ugly is a state of mind, if someone says you are, then you believe it.

Constance Briscoe - author of Ugly - fought off a lifetime of abuse to become a woman who is beautiful on the outside and on the inside.

Ugly is a harrowing book outlining years of physical and mental abuse she suffered. The sheer brutality that she endured as a child, and her determination to 'get on with it,' are immediately apparent.

As the terrible true-life story unfolds it is almost as if the reader is standing, unseen, in a corner of the room looking in.

Constance - called Clare by her family - was a chronic bedwetter, and it is impossible not to smell the soaking sheets and the stench of stale urine as you turn the pages.

But Clare's innate strength that takes her from beating to beating, nights spent on reeking wet sheets and sopping nightdresses, and her refusal not to give in provides a lighter touch.

Constance said: "I never thought for one moment that I had any inner strength. I needed money to eat and to live so getting on with it was the option I chose. I don't know if any other child would have done what I did. Perhaps they might have given up."

No matter how many slaps, kicks or punches she received from her mother or stepfather Constance eagerly turned to her school homework each day.

"I hadn't thought of it before but doing homework provided a kind of solace, a haven. I enjoyed homework and did it so I wouldn't get detention and to become qualified."

Constance entitled her book Ugly - but was she really that bad to look at?

"My mother said I was born ugly. As soon as I was aware what it meant I took a look in the mirror, I could see that I was an ugly person.

"If my mother had never called me ugly I might not have considered myself so, but I did have rubber tyre lips a big nose and large feet.

"I think my mother hated me so much because I wet the bed. As a parent it gets you down when there is another wet bed and another wet sheet plus the stench. She saw me as a financial burden, she was exasperated with me."

Despite seeing experts and having complicated alarm systems set up in her bedroom to try and help her, nothing worked.

"My mother saw the bedwetting as my 'bad habit' and said I was doing it deliberately."

On a school trip to court Constance, who wanted to become a barrister, met barrister Michael Mansfield. Later she got a grant and studied law.

"I think the turning point in my life when I finally felt I had become a person in my own right was after I qualified as a barrister and had my children and could think 'I am, good at that.' "It all depends on how comfortable you are with yourself. I have had cosmetic surgery. I am no longer ugly, but I am getting there. I would like to have some work done on my eyes. My feet were very broad so I had them narrowed. However I don't agree with surgery merely for cosmetic reasons."

Constace's second book Beyond Ugly chroicles her life working hard to pay for surgery and studying law.

Now a successful barrister and part time judge Constance regularly holds book signings where she answers numerous questions and hears many stories almost as harrowing as her own.

"People say they have a story to tell but the only difference between us is that I have told it. At my first talk in Clapham Junction a girl said she had three toes amputated because her mother twisted them around. She had never told anyone before.

"There is more abuse around than people realise. I have no regrets onwriting the book, it is the best thing I have ever done, it has helped a lot of people in a way I could have not contemplated.

"People don't talk about it, some go to the grave and no one ever knows. We should not remain silent."

Constance admitted there is just one more mountain to climb before she becomes truly happy - her biggest desire is to present on Strictly Come Dancing.

"I would love to take over from Bruce Forsythe, I would love to have a go but I bet I would be booted off in the first round. "

Constance will look lovely in a ball gown, high heels and a handsome dance partner.

Around the site