Firefighter delays

Councillor Clyde Loakes should be utterly ashamed of himself for his barefaced denial that this crackpot Mini Holland scheme is not causing delays for fire engines.

Last week I had an unfortunate accident at home with a pilchard and pistachio traybake on too high a heat. I turned my back for a second and whoosh, the whole lot went up like the Blitz.

Never mind I lost my eyebrows, but I was in some danger of burning the whole house down. My neighbour, smelling the oily smoke coming out of my letterbox, took fright and phoned 999 pronto. No delays there.

However, it was a good hour and 10 minutes before the engine fetched up at my house having been held up by cyclists taking their time in those silly lanes.

I was lucky as I was able to douse the flames with a bottle of dandelion and burdock that I was saving for my birthday the following week. The traybake was a goner though. Stop this Mini Holland madness before we are all burnt to a crisp.

Fran Beardley, Byron Road, Walthamstow