SHOWS

To Oct 12

Speed the Plow - satire focusing on Hollywood by David Mamet, Broadway Theatre, Catford Broadway, Catford, 8pm, £7/£5 conc, 020 8698 0002.

To Oct 13

The Maias - play charting decline of a wealthy family and the incestuous relationship between an unsuspecting brother and sister, Greenwich Playhouse, Greenwich Station Forecourt, Greenwich High Road, 7.45pm, £10/£8 conc, 020 8858 9256.

To Oct 5

Dial M for Murder - thriller centred around blackmail, murder and intrigue, with Tony Scannel, star of The Bill, Stag Theatre, London Road, Sevenoaks, 8pm, £12/£10/£6 conc, 01732 450175.

The Cemetery Club - comedy about three Jewish widows who visit their husband's graves each month, Wickham Theatre Centre, Corkscrew Hill, West Wickham, 7.45pm, membership required, 020 8777 3037.

Oct 2-5

Magyar Melodies - musical comedy, Bob Hope Theatre, Eltham, 7.30pm, £9/£7.50 conc, 020 8650 4569.

Oct 2-12

Lucky Stiff - musical about a man taking his dead uncle to Monte Carlo to win $6 million, Barn Theatre, Rose Bruford College, Burnt Oak Lane, Sidcup, 7.30pm, £6/£4 conc, 07786 617891. (see shows)

Oct 3 & 4

Curtains - black comedy from Stephen Bill performed by the Hayes Players, Hayes Village Hall, Hayes, 8pm, £5, 020 8462 5194.

Oct 4

Woman Wizard - Robert Llewellyn, Perrier Award-nominated star of Red Dwarf, with his own show, Broadway Theatre, Catford Broadway, Catford, 8pm, £12.50/£10.50, 020 8690 0002. (see shows)

Oct 5

The Gasman Cometh - celebration of the absurdist wit and wickedly subversive lunacy of Flanders & Swann comedy, Mick Jagger Centre, Shepherds Lane, Dartford, 7.30pm, £8/£7 conc, 01322 291100. (see shows)

Oct 2-12

Sadly Solo Joe - story of New Yorker Joe Murphy's search for the right girl, or any girl for that matter! Greenwich Theatre, Crooms Hill, Greenwich, 8pm, £17/£15 conc, 020 8858 7755.

Oct 4-12

Rocky Horror Big 30 Show - rock n' roll musical which remains the ultimate party pick-me-up, still flirty and dirty at 30, Churchill Theatre, High Street, Bromley, 7.45pm, £21/£18/£16, 020 8460 6677.

Oct 8

The Changeling - 17th-Century love, murder and madness given contemporary interpretation by director Dawn Walton, Southwark Playhouse, Southwark Bridge Road, London, 7.30pm, £10/£6 conc, 020 7620 3494. (see shows)

Oct 9-12

Patience - play dealing with rivalry between two poets based loosely on Oscar Wilde and Algernon Swinburne, St Johns Church Hall, Church Avenue, Sidcup, 7.30pm, 020 8467 6749.

DANCE

Oct 4

English Country Dancing - dance in the English tradition, St Barnabus Church Hall, Perth Road, Beckenham, 8pm, £2, 020 8777 3336.

Oct 5

Angika: Pulse of Tala - regeneration of classical Bharata Natyam dance for a modern stage, Greenwich Dance Agency, Royal Hill, Greenwich, 7.30pm, £9/£7, 020 8293 9741.

Back to Basics - move and groove to the latest sounds of R n' B and Hip Hop, Greenwich Dance Agency, Borough Hall, Royal Hill, 2pm, £7/£5 conc, 020 8293 9741.

Oct 9

Salsa Vida - salsa dance night with DJ and professional dancers, Sahara Club, Lewisham High Street, Lewisham, £5/£3, 7.30pm, 020 8690 4036.

Oct 10

Sidcup Salsa - dance party night with the theme of uniforms including tuition, Marlowe Rooms, Station Road, Sidcup, 8.30pm, £5, 07956 545666.

ARTS

To Nov 4

Solitary Beginnings - Adele Love, painter and photographer, producers first solo exhibition, Time Bar, College Approach, Greenwich, 5pm-11pm, free, 020 8305 9767.

To Oct 11

Earth and Heaven, Heaven and Earth - exhibition of new paintings and ceramics by Este Macleod, 6.30pm-9.30pm, Greenwich Village Gallery, Turnpin Lane, Greenwich, 020 8858 2290.

Oct 1-11

Studio Landscapes - landscape design in partnership with Bromley Field Studies Centre, The Studio, Beckenham Road, Beckenham, 9am-5.30pm, free, 020 8663 0103.

Oct 4-26

Expressions of Soul - group of artist display work drawn form cultural themes as part of Black History Month, Arthouse Gallery, Lewisham Way, New Cross, 11am-6pm Wed-Sat, free, 020 8244 3168.

To Oct 12

Patricia Tucker - exhibition of watercolours and oil paintings, Ripley Arts Centre, Sundridge Avenue, Bromley, 7.30pm-9.30pm, 020 8464 5816.

Art Exhibition - acrylic paintings & figurative ceramic sculptures of dreamlike landscape and angels, by Este Macleod, Greenwich Village Gallery, Turnpin Lane, Greenwich, free, 020 8858 2290.

To Oct 23

Riverside - series of photographs by Mickey Donoghue, Citizens Gallery, Powis Street, Woolwich.

To Apr 27

Oceans of Discovery - remarkable tales from the world's most famous explorers such as Captain Cook and Jacques Cousteau, National Maritime Museum, Greenwich, £3, 020 8312 6790/6545.

To Dec 1

David Wilkie: 1785-1841 Painter of Everyday Life - exhibition of work by one of the most spectacularly successful careers of any British artist, Dulwich Picture Gallery, Gallery Road, Dulwich, Mon closed, Tues-Fri 10am-5pm, weekends 11am-5pm, £7/£6/£3/children free, 020 8693 5254.

To Dec 29

Lace Fans for Ladies exhibition of lace fans as used by high-society women, Fan Museum, Crooms Hill, Greenwich, 10am-5pm, £3.50/£2.50, 020 8305 1441.

COMEDY

Oct 4

Robert Llewellyn - new show from Scrap Heap Challenge frontman called Woman Wizard training men how to deal with long-term relationships, Broadway Theatre, Catford, 8pm, £12.50/£10.50 conc, 020 8690 0002. (see shows)

Simon Evans, Mark Walker & Mike Wilmot, Up the Creek, Creek Road, Greenwich, 8pm, £10/£6 conc, 020 8858 4581.

Francesca Martinez, Trevor Crook & Simon Evans, Up the Creek Too, Brighton Road, Croydon, 8pm, £10/£6 conc, 020 8293 4077.

Oct 5

Chris Addison, Mark Walker & Simon Evans, Up the Creek, Creek Road, Greenwich, 7pm, £14, conc £10, 020 8858 4581.

Simon Evans, Cole Parker & Mike Wilmot, Up the Creek Too, Brighton Road, Croydon, £14/£10, 7pm, 020 8293 4077.

Oct 6

Chris Addison, Simon Evans & Mike Wilmot, Up the Creek, Creek Road, Greenwich, £6/£4 conc, 8pm, 020 8858 4581.

Oct 10

Al Murray - as his favourite character, The Pub Landlord, Broadway Theatre, Catford, 8pm, £16.50, 020 8690 0002. (see shows)

Oct 11

Jimmy Carr, Patrick Monohan & Jeff Innocent, Up the Creek, Creek Road, Greenwich, 8pm, £10/£6 conc, 020 8858 4581.

Jeff Innocent, Alistair Barry & Raymond & Mr Timkins Revue, Up the Creek Too, Brighton Road, Croydon, 8pm, £10/£6 conc, 020 8293 4077.

Jenny Eclair - talks about growing old gracelessly, her 40th birthday night out and parent-teacher associations, Stag Theatre, London Road, Sevenoaks, 8pm, £12/ conc, £10, 01732 450175.

JAZZ

Oct 2

Julia Doig & Dave Ramm - swinging vocal/piano pair, Pizza Express, High Street, Orpington, 7.45pm, 01689 833811.

Roy Williams & Dave Herridge - virtuoso trombonist & ever-ready pianist, Pizza Express, High Street, Beckenham, 7.45pm, 020 8650 0593.

Club Tabou - gypsy jazz guitar duo raises the roof, Pizza Express, Bluewater, 7.45pm, 01322 427526.

Oct 3

New Uptown Gang - shamelessly mixing it downtown, United Services Club, Main Road, Sidcup, 8.30pm, £5.

Oct 4

Delta Jazz Band - featuring drummer Colin Bowden, Farnborough Sports Club, High Street Farnborough, 8.30pm, 01689 603299.

Oct 5

Sandra Lawrence & Phil Mead - songs, piano & three-course dinner, Clarendon Hotel, Montpellier Row, Blackheath, 8pm, £25, 020 8318 4321.

Oct 6

Tony Barber Trio - debonair drummer delights diners, Marriott Hotel Restaurant, Broadway Bexleyheath, 1pm, 020 8298 1000.

John China - solo pianist adds lunchtime spice, Clarendon Hotel, Montpellier Row, Blackheath, 8pm, £25, 020 8318 4321.

Julia Farino - theatrical chanteuse, Prima Donnas, Red Lodge Road, West Wickham, 7.30pm, 020 8777 8433.

Oct 7

Lisa Kavanagh - effervescent vocalist, Prima Donnas, Red Lodge Road, West Wickham, 7.30pm, 020 8777 8433.

Dave Gelly & Les Simons Band - relaxed, Lester Youngish sax player, King's Head, High Street, Bexley, 8.30pm, £5, 01322 527803.

Oct 8

Dave Miller - venue's favourite solo pianist, Pizza Express, Widmore Road, Bromley, 7.45pm, 020 8464 2708.

Oct 9

Sax Appeal Quintet - Derek Nash & Gary Plumley lead afternoon workshop & evening concert, Mick Jagger Centre, Shepherd's Lane Dartford, 8pm, £6/£4, 01322 291100.

Helen Keating & Phil Snack - guest spot for vocal/sax duo, Bob Hope Theatre, Wythfield Road, Eltham, 8.30pm, £3.

Kit Packham & Perry White - kings of jumping jive & boogie, Pizza Express, High Street, Beckenham, 7.45pm, 020 8650 0593.

Lisa Kavanagh & Dominic Ashworth - sparkling vocal/guitar duo, Pizza Express, Bluewater, 7.45pm, 01322 427526.

ROCK/POP

Oct 4

Anne Nicholas - slightly jaded look at the trials and tribulations of love expressed through songs, St Andrews Arts Centre, Royal Pier Road, Gravesend, 8pm, £4/£3.50 conc, 01474 326140.

Oct 5

Amor and Little Egypt - two the UK's better-known rock bands, The Cartoon, London Road, Croydon, 8pm, £6, 020 8239 1616.

Oct 6

Answers on a Postcard - Stan the Man's band, The Cartoon, London Road, Croydon, 8pm, free, 020 8239 1616.

Oct 7

Electric Jam - all musicians and singers welcome, guitars, drums, keyboards provided, The Alexandra, Parish Lane, Penge, 9pm, free, 020 8776 7694.

Oct 8

Violet High - local alternative metal bands, The Cartoon, London Road, Croydon, 8pm, £3, 020 8239 1616.

Oct 11

Helen Shapiro Farewell Concert - long-time popstar hits the stage for the last time supported by guests including Kenny Ball, Fairfield Halls, Park Lane, Croydon, 8pm, £16.50/£14.50 conc, 020 868 9291. (see music)

Flamin Slade - Slade tribute band, The Cartoon, London Road, Croydon, 8pm, £6, 020 8239 1616.

FOLK/COUNTRY

Oct 3

Paul Sirman - sea shanties, traditional & contemporary folk music, Orpington Folk Club, Anglesae Arms, Kent Road, Orpington, 8.15pm, 01689 885716.

Oct 4

Dave's Stepin Country Disco - country sounds from Dave's Wheels of Steel, Littlebrook Power Station Sports Club, Dartford, 7.30pm, £5, 020 8302 2390.

Oct 8

Rag Mama Rag - Gallic folk band all the way from France add a "Euro" flavour to proceedings, Dartford Folk Club, Dartford Working Men's Club, Essex Road, Dartford, 8.30pm, 01322 222553.

Oct 10

Singers and Musicians Night - all welcome to come and perform, Orpington Folk Club, Anglesae Arms, Kent Road, Orpington, 8.15pm, 01689 885716.

Oct 15

Jim McClean Band - long-time folk rockers simply get rockin', Dartford Folk Club, Dartford Working Men's Club, Essex Road, Dartford, 8.30pm, 01322 222553.

CLASSICAL/OPERA

Oct 4

Magical Moments with the Mossman Singers - songs from the shows and excerpts from Brahms' Gypsy Songs, Farningham Village Hall, Farningham, 8pm, £5, 01689 828652.

Oct 6

The Philharmonia Orchestra - renditions of music by Mozart, Brahms and Carse, Broadway Theatre, Catford, 3pm, £15/£12 conc, 020 8690 0002.

Oct 8

Helen Reid - plays piano sonatas by Provokiev & Janacek among other gems, Blackheath Halls, Lee High Road, Blackheath, 8pm, £8/£5, 020 8463 0100.

Oct 9

Innocent Ears? - Ian Bailey explores whether preconceptions are inevitable when listening to music, Orpington Library, Church Hill, Orpington, 7.45pm, 01689 827284.

Oct 11

Franciscan Babes - religious & classical music & songs from the shows in aid of the Children's Society, All Saints' Church, Bark Hart Road, Orpington, 7.30pm, £5, 01689 832031.

LECTURES/DAYS OUT

Oct 5

Soul Food 4 All - learn more about Caribbean food, culture & tradition in this masterclass in Nouvelle Caribbean, Horniman Museum, London Road, Forest Hill, 2pm-5pm, £6, 020 8291 8690.

Oct 7

An Audience with Ruby Wax - evening with the top comedienne, Large Hall, Bromley Central Library, 7pm, £4, tickets from Ottakar's bookstore, The Glades, Bromley, 020 8460 6037. (see shows)

Oct 11

Cookery demonstration by Mary Berry - based on her new book, Cook Now, Eat Later, Ottakar's bookstore, The Glades, Bromley, noon, 020 8460 6037.

CHILDREN

Oct 5

Aladdin and his Wonderful Lamp - colourful & funny version of popular story with glove and rod puppets, Warehouse Theatre, Dingwall Road, Croydon, 11am, suitable for children aged three-seven, £3.50/£4.50, 020 8680 4060.

Oct 12

Ling Chung the Dragon - selfish Emperor stops his people from using his garden, Warehouse Theatre, Dingwall Road, Croydon, 11am, £4.50/£3.50 conc, 020 8680 4060.